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How Fear Motivates False Alphas and Bravery Defines True Ones

I had a really interesting conversation with someone the other day. He caught me off guard with something he said, "You never tell a woman how you feel about her. That's giving all your power away. That's so beta!"

At first, I couldn't help but smile. In my mind, it was just such a strange thing to say.

False Alphas

It was clear this guy, and so many others, have it all wrong.

You shouldn't be afraid to express your feelings if you're genuinely confident and self-assured. Being an "alpha" isn't holding your cards close to your chest and never letting anyone know what you think or feel. That's not strength; it's cowardice.

Telling a woman how you honestly feel about her is one of the bravest things a man can do! It takes real guts to put yourself out there and be vulnerable. But when you do, you're also showing her that you value your truth and respect her enough, to be honest with her.

And here's the thing: if she doesn't feel the same way, that's okay. It doesn't mean you're weak or somehow lost your power. It just means that she's not the right person for you. You can move on and find someone who is a better fit. And the best part is you spoke your truth, and you can save each other time and disappointment. And yes, it's painful, but love and pain come together. There is no such thing as love without eventual heartbreak.

In the end, it all comes down to self-confidence. If you're constantly worried about being an "alpha" or a "beta," you'll never be truly happy and likely have too much time on your hands. You'll always compare yourself to others and wonder if you measure up; this is always a losing game. Instead, focus on finding your purpose and pursuing your passions. When you're doing what you love and living your best life, you won't have time to worry about labels or who has more "power."

So don't be afraid to speak your truth and express your feelings. It's not a sign of weakness; it's a sign of strength. And remember: you are in control of your own life. Don't let anyone else tell you what it means to be an "alpha."

Opportunities to work with Alex, for you or the men in your lives!

1. The Torch: A Weekly Virtual Men’s Group & Community

This is a no-brainer, super low commitment way for any growth-minded men to dip their toe in (for just $50/month). Seriously, join us or get your partners, friends, brothers, fathers, etc. in here!!

For an hour every week (but with the expectation of joining at least 2 calls per month), men from all over the world who want to become better partners, fathers, leaders, or just better versions of themselves, connect in a safe space to share and unload their stresses, burdens, and challenges, without judgment or advice.

Alex and his business partner Bob share mini-lessons on empowering topics like mindset and healthy masculinity, and then hold space, celebrate honest sharing, and help the men to set intentions in their lives.

Additionally, all members get access to a private online community to share wins, give and get support and advice and build new relationships with other men.

Here is all of the info + the next steps to sign up; if not for you please share with the men in your life!

2. The Alchemy of Men Retreat - coming up June 7-11 in Fairview, Utah.

This is for the man who would likely never go on a retreat, but is interested in personal and professional growth, accomplishing business goals, becoming better partners and parents, and creating brotherhood with other growth-minded men.

For 4 days and 4 Nights men will enjoy:

-Meals by a New York 5 Star Chef

-A 10,000 sq foot house with sauna, jacuzzi, and cold plunge

-Surrounded by nature

-Powerful work around creating peace, connection, purpose, and clarity in their lives

-Private Rooms, Shared Rooms, and even a Tent Option (for the Outdoorsman) are available, at a range of investment levels.

For more info checkout

If you or the men in your life have questions about any of the above, just email

And remember you can also check out my other blog posts:


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